Text me
by CreekGnomes
Summary: A collection of humorous texts between the South Park boys and girls. PM me if you have a request. Both romantic and platonic pairings. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**11:15**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Tweek?_

**11:17**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Yep_

**11:18**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Come to my house? I'm bored._

**11:23**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Tweek?_

**11:28**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_TWEEK_

**11:40**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_I had an accident..._

**11:41**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_What kind of accident? Are you ok?_

_**11:43**_

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Clyde came up behind me when I was doing a shift and he scared me..._

**11:44**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_I'll beat him up for you. So what happened? Did you spill coffee over him? Wish I could have been there to see that ;)_

**11:45**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Don't beat anyone up Craig! You'll get in trouble again! And Clyde didn't mean to!_

**11:47**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Oh, and um, I spilt coffee over myself :(_

**11:48**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_I should have known :) My little spaz, you._

**11:51**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_I'm not your little spaz!_

**11:52**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Uh, yes you are, sweetie pie :3_

**11:52**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Ok._

**11:54**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_I need to go have a shower now! I'm all sticky :'(_

**11:55**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_That's what she said ;)_

**xx**

**1****2:00**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Tweek?_

**12:06**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Baby, don't ignore me._

**12:07**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_I just got out of the shower! Sorry_

**12:08**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Are you still going to my house? Please, I love you._

**12:15**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_TWEEK ARE YOU COMING TO MY GODDAMN HOUSE OR NOT?_

**12:16**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_I'm coming!_

**12:16**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_That's what she said ;)_

**xx**

**1:19**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Craig, can I come round yours? Stan and Kyle are being gay here ;)_

**1:20**

**From: Stan Marsh**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_Wrong number, Kenny._

**1:22**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Stan Marsh**

_Oh. Just... Joking._

**xx**

**1:36**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Craig, can I come round yours? Stan just kicked me out ;)_

**1:37**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_No. I'm doing homework. And why did you put a winky face, weirdo?_

**1:41**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Because it make everything sound sexier ;) And hey, you're not doing homework! Tweek just put on his FaceBook that he's at your house!_

**1:46**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_Oh, did I say homework? Sorry, my bad. I'm meant to say something else._

**1:48**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_What?_

**1:51**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_What's blonde, spazzy and adorable?_

**1:52**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Me :)_

**1:53**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_You may be a spaz, and blonde, but you're not adorable._

**1:54**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Yeah I am ;)_

**1:56**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_t(-_-t)_

**1:58**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_...do you mean Tweek then?_

**1:59**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_There's your answer._

**2:01**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Oh. You're doing Tweek? LOL. You know how wrong that sounds right? ;)_

**2:04**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_Was my intention._

**2:04**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Dude._

**2:06**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Kenny McCormack**

_I'm going to carry on with that now so goodbye Kenny._

**2:07**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Oh._

**2:07**

**From: Kenny McCormack**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_;)_

**xx**

**6:34**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Craig!_

**6:35**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Yes, love?_

**6:35**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Don't call me that! We're not in love so I'm not your love!_

**6****:36**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_Oh :( Sorry, love._

**6:37**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_:(_

**6:37**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_:P_

**6:38**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_GAH! Knock it off!_

**6:39**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_*Sigh* Fine. What did you want anyway?_

**6:41**

**From: Tweek Tweak**

**To: Craig Tucker**

_Why is Kenny telling me how to use condoms? And asking me how big your thing is? How the hell would I know that?!_

**6:42**

**From: Craig Tucker**

**To: Tweek Tweak**

_I hesitate to answer those questions in fear they may incriminate me._

**xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**1:23**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Dude, can we talk?_

**1:25**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_Dude, its almost half past one._

**1:26**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_YOUR POINT?_

**1:26**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Sorry, my stupid phone made me go on caps lock_

**1:27**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_I can see that_

**1:29**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_SO?_

**1:30**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_You need to get your phone fixed, and your the one who wanted to talk anyway._

**1:31**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Guess what._

**1:31**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_Clyde, it is way too early for me to be playing guessing games. Just tell me what you want already. I'll do anything to make you leave me alone._

**1:32**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_Unless it involves money, I'm not lending you anymore money._

**1:33**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Don't use that tone with me :( And hey, I'm not a gold digger!_

**1:34**_  
_

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Ok, maybe I am ;p_

**1:35**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_..._

**1:35**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Just joking. I love you and not just for your money :)_

**1:36**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Oh wait, on second thoughts, just for the money ;)_

**1:38**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Why aren't you replying?_

**1:39**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_I hate you so much right now._

**1:39**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_What why? ;_;_

**1:40**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_Clyde, what's the time?_

**1:41**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_It's about 20 to 2, why?_

**1:42**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Token Black**

_That is why I hate you_

**1:43**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_No, you don't, otherwise you wouldn't be replying :) _

**1:46**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Token?_

**1:50**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_You're so mean! I hate you! I'm breaking up with you!_

**1:55**

**To: Token Black**

**From: Clyde Donavon**

_Tokie? Token, I didn't mean it :(_

**1:55**

**To: Clyde Donavon**

**From: Virgin Media**

_Token Black has disconnected his phone._

**xx**

* * *

Please review; it makes me really happy! I was really nervous about the first chapter, because I didn't find it that funny, But I'm glad you guys did :) Ily all!


End file.
